So THE MAN assigned me one chore this summer.
Only one chore.
Of course, there were a lot of better things to do than this one particular chore.
I mean, I had to bust out the angle grinder, sand off rust, use oil base paint, and make it look nice.
I was pretty sure it was a tall order for someone who has fallen out of her desk chair at work several times on accident.
And, I didn't take a before photo. I mean, I have one from afar. But lets face it. I always tried to pretend the blue doors in the background that were nagging at me didn't exist.
Can you see it WAYYYYYY in the background?
And for you folks from places other than here, these doors are a hatch way into your basement. Come fall, all my chairs on my deck, the grill, and stuff I have out in the garden will make it's way down to be stored in the warm via that hatchway door.
And lest you think I survived this whole painting the door thing unharmed?
Let me give you a visual.
I was painting this door in a bikini because
A) Bikini was the same color as paint
B) I sit in the inside all day and thought a bit of sun would be nice
C) Less clothing means I am less likely to have to wear a shirt around for a year with burgundy paint
D) I might be a moron.
E) all of the above.
So, at some point during the painting, I had to reach wayyyyyyy over to the center of the door. What better way to reach than to lean on the side of the hatchway. Which of course was already painted.
Did I mention it was oil base paint?
It looked like I got gored on my side. This look was pared up with an updo to keep hair out of harms way of paint that was slowly unraveling the stickier I got. (I have painted my hair before too)
THE MAN showed up a few minutes later on the mower in theory to check me out in my bikini and fled in horror.
Evidently the Zombie Look is not Sexy. Somebody phone Victoria Secret and let them know.